Rambles

Lately I've been addicted to youtube..... the make-up gurus are... creative!!~ I soo wanna buy everything they use... but it appears that the array of eyeshadow colours they have are beyond normal.. haha.... would b very expensive if i were to purchase em all *gulps*... and as usual i've been procastinating my work!!! i have to buck up!! running out of time!!!

Love's a game of give and take

But mama said you can't hurry love
No, you'll just have to wait
She said love don't come easy
It's a game of give and take
I can't hurry love, no, you'll just have to wait
Just trust, give it time
No matter how long it takes

I feel the same way too

It was our anniversary. On that very day, I was so caught up with my own problems n feelings that I totally lost track of the time. Since he went back to his normal life in Perth, I suddenly felt the distance. Magnified. Of course we have our ups and downs. And at this very moment we're striving to get past the down curve in this journey together. As long as we stop picking on each others fault and so I thought. Wrong.

In life, we often find ourselves confronted with things that we try hardest to avoid. And so we've been avoiding the topic for as long as we can. The time is drawing closer and there's no other choice but to talk about it. While I wish that I can spend my every single day being with him, I realize that I have only one shot in life to start my career in the UK. Sometimes I suffocate from being too logical. I feel that there are many things that are beyond my control. And hence to get a better control means trying my best to achieve the most of what I'm capable of.

Nevertheless, trying to take control means losing control. Its like a double-edged sword. I take control of my career yet I may lose control in the relationship. He has his point. We may not be able to talk the long hours, webcam whenever we want or see each other for 1 whole year. We may not be as involved as we are in each others' lives..... But I have faith.... I have faith that if it is meant to be, it will be for the better..... As much as I'm determined to stay, I find it quite overwhelming myself. I have to start my life all over again in a place where I don't really have friends. ALONE. It's gonna be my 4th time doing that in my life. And now I may not be given a choice to go back home or to go visit him before I start my war. =( I'm tired.. tired of being independent. I just wanna be with him.

P/s: And he blew me away again with his self-composed song as an anniversary surprise. Its as beautiful as his soul.

B-A-N-A-N-A-S!!

This post will be very random. And so I was thinking on one fine day....
Why must bananas turn so ugly after a few days??
Whyy????

Looks as if it has skin disease. I know I know..because its perishable... but why cant it be like an apple? the inside starts to rot before the skin..... Hrm... I was surfing n I saw dis fabulous invention!

Beautiful n colourful banana cases! Gives u more appetite before u open the case... n it prevents ur banana from getting all squashed in ur bag! Now you can carry ur bananas around with style!

I can't pour my ketchup out! Tell me whyyy... ain't nothing but a heartache... lol... WHY???

Hush Hush- PCD

Dumbfounded

The only thing that never cease to change is indeed change itself. I found this entry dating back to January 2004:

Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate...
Without them, what would shape our lives?
Perhaps if we never veered off course....
We wouldn't fall in love or have disputes or be who we are...
After all, seasons change...
So do cities..
People come into your life and people go...
But its comforting to know the ones you love are always in your heart...
And if you're very lucky, they'll return to you....

Of course there are times where I feel that my life is perfect. Everything is as planned. Yet, many a time I suddenly feel empty and lost. For e.g. I used to think that my clubber frens are not good influences. But then as I age, I found myself enjoying the night life. Until I met A, who used to think the way I did before my perceptions changed. I stopped but then only to find out that not long after that, A enter clubs too. I should be happy.....shouldn't I?

As I write this entry... my mind tells me "Yes I should be happy because now I don't have to feel bad!" but my heart on the contrary is of the opposite. I changed for the better and so I thought. I don't particularly like clubbing anymore. I felt as if I was put into many situations of shame (just because I enjoy dancing with my girlies) all for nothing.

My plans within the last 2 years was to finish my Bachelor Degree, my Masters Degree, and then to work in the UK. To live a life of my own. To discover my limits and of course my capabilities. To achieve the most that I can to give my parents a good life. However, my plans have changed. I was told the many reasons to not live according to my plans (not to be selfish). And so I have given up on them, ignoring the lil desire deep within me.

I'm afraid. Afraid that in few years down the road I find myself in the exact situation feeling empty, confused, and lost. Will all the speech of being considerate change with time? Will I find myself staring back at my past and regretting my decisions to ignore that desire deep within? What if what if..... Up til this very day, I still regret the many decisions I've made in the past. I don't wanna regret anymore. Sorry for all the rambling. I dont know if any of this makes sense.

Oh please dress me up!

Temporarily addicted to this song! Lady Gaga pronounces the designer names so sexily..
oOh la laa~~~

Tsk tsk... I'm so excited! 2moro will b d day where muh taste buds meet F Cup Cookie!!

A trip to Birmingham

Went for a short trip to Birmingham for my mango pie's convocation.... I'm honoured to b invited.... n I'm very proud of her! I was juggling between the roles of a photographer, a make-up artist, and of course an apple struddle~~ ^.^

and... as usual I couldn't resist the beauty of flowers... ^.^

we also went for a movie...Harry Potter's release of the Half-Blood Prince....

The first 10 mins of the movie was 3D (that explains d goggle-like glasses)...Its similar to those helicopter or car-like rides u find in theme parks where u feel as if ur IN the movie... flying in the air... or being on a really bumpy ride... that kinda thing.... but because there were other 3D adverts so the images suddenly appeared up front..... Was a bit dizzy coz I couldn't find my focus point... images were practically all over the place... haha.... and the movie was kinda disappointing...

Rusty

P says:
u say sekejap ur happy feel hangus mah
P says:
wao... i rmb the word hangus.. i m so impressed of myself...
S says:
pls la hangus not ngam in this sentence
S says:
hilang ba

This is the best that we can do after graduating from high school!! Haha...

His favourite song

A song which brings back a lot of beautiful memories.....



Love you baby...

F Cup Cookie

I was rolling on my bed for what seemed like hours.. wasnt me to have difficulties falling asleep.. =/
I had another weird dream... i dreamt of a gigantic worm looking for its egg.... and my 'friend' in dat dream took it n peeled of its shell... it was like a hard-boiled egg... lol.. and we were being chased by people who wanted us 2 b villians like them..... and somehow at some point i was invisible but then i got caught when my powers became weak.....hrm...... anyway... weird weird weird!!!

Anyway.. I'm sure many of u have heard about this F Cup Cookie fad from Japan. Supposedly it will increase ur bust size by half n inch or slightly more... low in calories n it doesnt make u put on any weight.. however, we are only advised to consume 2 a day 2 weeks before ur period... dis biscuit apparently contains natural ingredients which would increase ur female hormones.... I can't wait to try it!

Elavator - PCD

I find that PCD's new songs relate to many of our relationships these days...

If we could stop fightin' each other
Long enough for us to see that
That we are stronger together, than separate
Babe you gotta believe that,
But you love me today, don't want me 'round tomorrow
Everytime you change your mind, I follow
Caught up, fall up in your maze and I'm so dizzy babe
Can't keep goin' back and forth on these waves
I'm gettin' sea sick

Like the way we were before
And I wanna know if we can go
Back to the days when we was close
Cuz sometimes I think I'm solo
Think you don't want me no more
And I gotta get up off this seesaw
We're like an elevator

We go up and we go down, down, down
Like an elevator
We touch the sky and touch the ground, ground, ground
Like an elevator
You stuck on 1, while I'm pressin 3
Then we get up on the 4th floor, but then we disagree
And you keep on blamin' me
But I wish that you would see
That I'm just tryna elevate ya like an elevator

Take you higher,
That I'm just tryna elevate ya like an elevator
Take you higher,
That I'm just tryna elevate ya like an elevator

And I feel, like we speakin’ two different languages
It's hard to read ya,
But I know, if you at least try to make it half way
I swear that I'll meet ya, meet ya, meet ya
But we can't have a conversation without beefin'
Yellin' back and forth for no good reason
I won't let you leave and you keep askin' me to stay
One of us better figure out what we want
Cuz I'm gettin' a headache

Oh if there's any man who understand what I'm sayin'
Won't you help me say yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah)
Oh there gotta be some women who feelin' the way I'm feelin'
Say yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah), yeah
I'll take the blame if it'll make this go stop
I'll hope for you if we can make it to the top
But we gotta find a way to break down these walls baby
I'm waitin' on you, stop waitin' on me, damn this elevator

He was going to marry her

I have always had weird dreams. Vomitting snakes. Being chased by gigantic octopuses. Dancing with king kongs, etc. Last night... I dreamt that he dumped me for my best fren (sum random stranger). And I had to be with her ex somehow for what reason I dont know. He dumped me n he was gonna marry her! It was so real i could feel grief, regret, and anger *Sigh*.....I wish that will never happen.... is this some kind of sign?? =((( NOOOOOoooooo....

Updates

I just got back from London today. Day trip just to meet up n bond with my cousin whom I've not seen for 2-3 years now. Daphne (Olie's bff since primary sch) and her bf Richard was there too! From Newcastle, they went all the way down to London to spend a few days with her too! Hrm... I didn't buy or do much. Oh! I bought something for him. Hehe.... Hopefully this time it will be of use ^.^ *fingers crossed*

Just to backtrack a bit, went to Birmingham last Monday to look for a suitable 1 yr anniversary gift for him (Our anniversary's end if this month! yeay!!). Haha.... unfortunately didnt get ALL d things that i had in mind....the important things weren't there anymore *Sighhh*

Oh! I bought a new O2 simcard called O2 Your Country. Got it coz I could not send or receive any text msgs n the charges were quite pricey. Well... d good news is.... that I get 200 friggin free minutes for international calls whenever i top up 30 pounds! n i get to fish for the duck (surprises) and i got free texts and 50% discount on all calls made to any UK lines (tho only for a couple of days!).. Hurraaayy!!! Never been happier! Now I can call him whenever I can... ^.^ Hahaha!

Wo-Man

Good morning~

Hehe... finally after 3 consecutive nights of nightmares, I slept well last night. Should've slept a little longer though.. Haha... ^.^ A good way to start the day for me is and will always be:

Receiving a call from my sweetheart, listening to his gentle tone and his laughters. How I wish to end this long distance relationship!! haha.. Don't get me wrong! I just wish we could stay in the same place. Reminds me of a movie that we watched together in Perth, Kate and Leopold! A must watch!!

Lately I've been obsessed with this Korean drama called We Got Married. Its an online reality show where d korean celebrities are paired up together as a married couple (artificial couple). Apart from their routine like other newlyweds, cleaning up, cooking, etc., the couples are given missions each week. E.g. making kimchi, doing sports together, etc. I feel that some of them have really developed feelings for one another during the shows coz of the surprises, and the things they do for one another.... *Sighs of happiness* I wanna get married and live happily like that too.... hehe... ^.^ Watch it on : http://www.mysoju.com/we-got-married/

However, theres this one girl who divorced her husband because all he does is laze, eat, sleep, and doesn't understand her at all....

"Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater. If you give her sperm, she will give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she will give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she will give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her. So if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit."

This is from an email i received today. Guys, better treat ur girls right! Lots of love, A